When Submission Becomes Suppression: Confronting Sexism in Faith Communities

In many faith practices, "submission" holds deep spiritual significance. It can represent humility before the divine, mutual respect between partners, and the voluntary yielding of one's will as an act of devotion. However, this beautiful spiritual principle becomes contorted into something unrecognizable, a tool of control, limitation, and inequality.

The Distortion of a Sacred Concept

When examining religious texts across traditions, submission is not considered a gendered subjugation. Instead, it is a mutual spiritual practice, a reciprocal dance of respect and consideration. In Christian contexts, for example, while Ephesians 5:22 instructs wives to submit to their husbands, the preceding verse (oftentimes overlooked) calls for mutual submission: Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ.

The distortion occurs when submission becomes one-directional, demanded from women while exempting men from the same standard. This selective application transforms a spiritual discipline into systematic inequality.

Recognizing Sexism Disguised as Spiritual Authority

Consider these warning signs when submission is deemed sexist.

1. Selective application of religious texts
   Cherry-picking passages that emphasize women's submission while ignoring texts that call for mutual respect, love, and shared responsibility.

2. Silencing women's voices in spiritual discussions
   It can happen when women's theological insights, questions, or interpretations are not honored, simply because they come from women.

3. Limiting leadership based on gender alone
   Restricting women from teaching, leading, or making decisions based solely on gender rather than individual calling, gifting, or character.

4. Glorifying female sacrifice while normalizing male authority
   Celebrating women who surrender careers, dreams, and autonomy as "properly submissive" while never expecting similar sacrifices from men.

5. Spiritualizing inequality
   Framing unequal treatment as divinely ordained rather than culturally constructed.

Reclaiming Authentic Submission

Submission looks radically different from oppression - it is a spiritual practice that is:

• Voluntary, never coerced
• Mutual, practiced by all regardless of gender
• Contextual, not a blanket surrender of agency in all areas of life
• Love-centered, motivated by care rather than control
• Empowering, lifting rather than diminishing the dignity of all involved

Finding a Better Way Forward

For faith communities struggling with these issues, progress begins with honest conversation:

• Studying religious texts in their full context, including cultural backgrounds
• Creating space for diverse voices, especially women's perspectives on submission
• Examining whether community practices reflect the core values of love, justice, and human dignity
• Distinguishing between timeless spiritual principles and cultural expressions bound to specific historical contexts

Personal Reflection

As people of faith, we must continually ask ourselves difficult questions: Does our understanding of submission foster wholeness and flourishing for all people, or does it perpetuate systems that benefit some at the expense of others, and are we willing to challenge interpretations that justify inequality?

The most profound spiritual transformations often begin when we dare to question teachings that feel uncomfortable or inconsistent with the divine love we've experienced.

Submission to the divine and one another should never diminish human dignity but rather elevate our capacity for compassion, understanding, and mutual respect. When practiced authentically, it doesn't become a tool of oppression but a pathway to deeper connection.

What experiences have you had with these concepts in your faith journey?