- Allow Yourself to Grieve - The end of a marriage is a significant loss, and it's essential to permit yourself to grieve. Allow yourself to feel the full range of emotions that come with divorce, whether it's sadness, anger, or confusion. Seek support from friends, family, or a therapist who can provide a listening ear and help you navigate this emotional journey.
- Focus on Self-Care - During this challenging time, self-care becomes more important than ever. Make time for activities that can nourish your mind, body, and soul, whether practicing yoga, walking in nature, or indulging in a favorite hobby. Prioritize your spiritual, physical, and emotional well-being by eating healthily, getting enough sleep, and engaging in activities that bring you joy.
- Rediscover Your Identity - Divorce often brings a sense of identity crisis, especially for women who may have defined themselves primarily through their roles as wives and mothers. Take this opportunity to rediscover your individuality outside of motherhood and marriage. Reflect on your passions, interests, and goals, and explore new opportunities for personal growth and self-expression.
- Build a Support Network - Surround yourself with a supportive network of friends, family, and peers who uplift and encourage you during this transition. Lean on those who offer a listening ear, practical advice, and unconditional love. Join support groups or online communities for divorced women where you can connect with others who understand what you're going through and share experiences and insights.
- Take Practical Steps - As you navigate the practical aspects of divorce, such as dividing assets, establishing financial independence, and co-parenting arrangements if applicable, seek guidance from legal and financial professionals who can provide expert advice and support. Educate yourself about your rights and options, and take proactive steps to secure your financial future and create a stable foundation for yourself and your family.
- Embrace New Opportunities - Divorce can be a catalyst for positive change and new beginnings. Embrace this opportunity to explore new interests, pursue career aspirations, or embark on adventures you've always dreamed of. Allow yourself to dream big and set goals for the future, knowing that you have the strength and resilience to overcome any challenges that come your way.
March 29, 2024
Starting Over After a Divorce
July 3, 2023
Don't Shrink
On the other hand, when Jesus died on the Cross, He did so to express His unconditional love for humankind. He knew the shedding of His blood on the Cross would be the final time blood would have to be shed for our redemption from sin. Jesus did not shrink or go into hiding. On His journey, He would step away for restoration to continue his ministry and mission. But Jesus never went into hiding because He was clear about who He was, who He was serving, and why He was serving.
Today, many women are in relationships where they have chosen to shrink instead of allowing their love to illuminate because the true purpose of love is not prevalent in their lives. Their spouse or mate is mandating her to negate her identity in the name of love, silence her voice in the name of love, surrender her will in the name of love, and deny her truth and values all in the name of love. These requirements are debilitating! They do not help women elevate to become the best versions of themselves. And our society is replete with women experiencing abuse and being held captive in the illusion of love.
There are four types of love, Eros, Agape, Phileo, and Storge - each type serves a distinct purpose. Learn and study them to discover the ones that have been prevalent in you and your relationships. Allow God's love to guide you on your journey of self-discovery and awareness to evolve into the best version of yourself.
December 30, 2022
Your Pathway to Cybersecurity Career
- CompTIA FC0-U61: IT Fundamentals
- CompTIA A+ 220-1001 (Core 1) and CompTIA A+ 220-1002 (Core 2)
- CompTIA N10-007: CompTIA Network+
- CompTIA SY0-501: Security+
- CompTIA Cybersecurity Analyst (CSA+)
- CompTIA CAS-001: Advanced Security Practitioner (CASP)
March 28, 2019
Submission
June 12, 2017
How We Get Here?
- How We Get Here? – Why black women and their issues are ignored in politics? - Source: Status of Black Women in Politics
- How We Get Here? – Black women 16 years and over has experienced the highest unemployment rate among all other ethnic groups since 2007. - Source: The African American Labor Force in Recovery
- How We Get Here? – Black women are more likely to have children outside of marriage than other racial or ethnic groups. - Source: Congressional Research Service
- How We Get Here? – Women and Violence – 1 out of 5 women is sexually assaulted in college. Source: insidehighered.com
- How We Get Here? - Women Living with HIV and AIDS - Source: CDC.gov
- How We Get Here? - Women are 80 percent more likely than men to be impoverished in retirement. - Source: National Institute on Retirement
- How We Get Here? - Women of Color are more likely to suffer with depression. - Source: Huffingtonpost.com
June 9, 2017
Allow People to Grow
- Mortgage their homes to prevent a loved one from going to jail.
- Expend their retirement to prevent foreclosure or pay for college.
- Become a custodian to their abandoned or neglected grandchildren.
- Decrease their savings to pay their children’s expenses to keep their lives afloat.
July 19, 2016
Poverty is Colorblind
Poverty is more than having more bills at the end of the month than money. It's extreme, situational, institutional, or generational; making it difficult to create pathways to economic independence, wealth, and stability.
When we seek support or investment in our work to decrease the trend of poverty amongst women throughout the Washington region, we often receive a plethora of reasons of why we shouldn't help them because their level of poverty isn't as severe as women experiencing poverty in other countries. A local pastor stated, You haven't seen poverty until you've been to a country where people have to drink and bathe in dirty water. Now, that's poverty. What we have here (i.e., in the U.S.), isn't poverty. Does this mean we should negate our efforts to help women and children experiencing poverty in the U.S. if they have access to clean water?
When our lives are threatened by a disease, we collaborate our energy and resources to find a cure, or a way to stop it from spreading. We don't assess if one disease deserves more attention than the other because of the impact the disease may have on all humanity.
Ignoring the plight of poverty will not eradicate it, but heighten it because poverty affects all ethnicities and nationalities.
July 12, 2016
Equal, But Different
Should women who live subjectively to men expect equal treatment?
According to Genesis 1:26, God said, Let Us make man in Our image, according to Our likeness; and to let them have dominion over every living thing that creeps on the earth. And, according to Genesis 1:27, "God created man in His own image; in the image of God He created him; male and female He created them."
These verses share how God equally created men and women in His image to have dominion over the earth in our own distinctive roles. If women grasp hold of this knowledge, maybe women will seek equality through the Image of God instead of man.
November 3, 2015
Do you want to get well?
The mother praised her son for his efforts to protect her when she spoke outside Potomac High School – where her son attended. She described her relationship with her live-in boyfriend as a friendship and stated, “I think sometimes you never think that helping someone will end up in this matter.” Our paraphrase, she never thought her efforts to help someone would result in her son’s death.
John Chapter 5 talks about a pool called Bethesda where sick people laid in wait for an angel to stir the pool water and whoever stepped in first would get healed from whatever disease they had. A man lying by the pool with an infirmity for thirty-eight years caught Jesus’ attention because He knew the infirmed man suffered with this condition for a long time. Jesus asked the infirmed man, “Do you want to be made well?” The infirmed man’s response, “Sir, I have no man to put me into the pool when the water is stirred up; but while I am coming, another steps down before me.”
The debilitating health of many people lingers too long because of their beliefs and emotional strongholds. Unfortunately, many women fall prey to men who play victim of their inability to be fully engaged in society as a result of unhealed wounds or their choice to hold onto behaviors that contribute to violence. For thirty-eight years, the infirmed man waited for assistance to get in the pool of Bethesda. Jesus could have laid him in the pool, but instead, He told the man to, “Rise, take up your bed and walk.” Immediately, the man was made well, he took up his bed, and he walked.
Too many women are dying by the hands of men who haven’t recognized their need to get healed. So, women please stop jeopardizing the safety and sanity of yourself and family in the name of love and salvation. You do not have the power to heal or save, but God does. And, his healing and salvation is available to anyone who needs and wants it.
May 14, 2015
Pursue Your Greatest Self
We set our heights to empower women to transform their lives by transforming their minds through biblically-based fellowships and our quarterly newsletter - Inspirational Expressions. As we evolved, we realized we lost focus on our spiritual core.
What was true at our origin stands true today; women cannot achieve or be their greatest without knowing their true power. Unfortunately, this power has been decreased to sexuality and looks, and this power isn’t sustainable like our innate power during seasonal challenges.
Oprah Winfrey states, “Everyone is trying to pursue their greatest being of their true selves.” If this is true for you, here are a few things to consider:
- Seek God first and His wisdom (Matthew 6:13; James 1:5).
- Pray and give thanks always (I Thessalonians 5:17-18).
- See yourself as God does because we were fearfully and wonderfully made in His image (Genesis 1:26; Psalm 139:14).
- Get rid of limited beliefs about God and your potential because through Him all things are possible and we can do any and every thing through His power and strength (Matthew 19:26; Philippians 4:13).
- Govern your life according to God’s will because He will not withhold things that are good from people that walk upright (Psalm 84:11).
- Live life with abundance filled with joy, hope, love, and contentment (John 10:10).
- Trust God with your heart, mind, and soul (Proverbs 3:5).
March 2, 2015
Giving: An Antedote to Poverty?
When people are in need, some tend to their needs first before others. This is especially true for women and families living without basic necessities for an extended period of time. However, the widow woman did not allow her extremities to prevent her from making provisions for Elijah. Following are a few characteristics the widow woman exuded that changed her impoverished stance:
- She was not a complainer.
- She was very humble and industrious.
- She was charitable and generous.
- She had strong faith and confidence in God and His word.
Matthew 10:8b states, “Freely you have received, freely give.” Galatians 6:7b, states, “For whatsoever a man soweth, that shall he also reap.” And, Luke 6:38 states, “Give, and it shall be given unto you; good measure, pressed down, and shaken together, and running over, shall men give into your bosom. For with the same measure that ye mete withal it shall be measured to you again.”
The measure of our lives will be determined by how we give, not how we receive. How does your life measure up?
Note: Bible verses are from The King James Version of the Bible.
December 2, 2014
Invest in yourself
"If my company wants me to stay, they should pay for my training."
"As soon as I get my MBA, I’m out of here!"
"I only enroll in workshops or classes that are free."
If your company pays for training, who’s investing in your professional development, you or your company? If your company pays, what do they get in return? If you pay, what’s the ROI (Return on Investment) for your growth and development?
Imagine hiring a contracting company that specializes in home renovations showing up at your doorstep without the skills, tools, or resources to perform the job. Would you pay for the training and resources the contracting company needs to complete the job? Or, would you hire another contracting company equipped with resources and expertise to meet your requirements and deadline to renovate?
Corporations are discovering better ways to yield returns on their resources and investments. And unfortunately, this doesn’t include ‘human’ capital because too many corporations have witnessed and experienced their education and training investments walk out the door.
If your career has come to a screeching halt, evaluate where you invest most of your time and money. If you plan to excel in your current or future place of employment, you have to transition to self-directed and life-long learners. The library is replete with ‘free’ resources for professional or career development and some organizations are replete with ‘fee-based’ resources. The resource you choose would be based on what you’re trying to achieve and why?
Education has been recognized as an integral path to economic empowerment and wealth. Not designer bags, shoes, or acrylic nails. If you’ve been blessed with these things great! But, if you invest more in these things than yourself, evaluate how these things have positioned you to create the foundation to your financial independence and stability?
Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. stated, “We buy what we want and beg for what we need”. Education is a needed commodity to evolve and thrive in today’s society and your growth will be measured by what you endow to yourself.
October 28, 2014
Skeptics of The Poor
- Why were they evicted?
- Are they tithing members of a church?
- They must be irresponsible women to be evicted from a shelter.
- Why can't they move to another shelter?
- I don't believe in giving my money to people that don't want to help themselves.
- Why can't they go and stay with relatives?
October 23, 2014
We Plunged
We’ve supported Zumbathon® events to benefit heart disease and ovarian cancer. And one-year later we’re hosting our own to benefit women experiencing poverty in the Washington region.
The Zumba® Corporate Office approved our Zumbathon® Charity Event within two-hours of submission - a process that normally takes two-business days, and within four-weeks, only 10% of our desired participants have registered.
Lesson learned, we’re doing something we’ve never done before and its success can’t be measured solely on who showed up; but, on our commitment to work and move the weight of poverty off the shoulders of women who live with it daily right in our backyard.
Not achieving the desired results from this plunge will not stop us from doing it again. Poverty is growing, and we do not have time to be stagnated by fear, skepticism, or resistance.
If you want to experience growth and enthusiasm click here - this can result from trying something new.
September 26, 2014
I’m Not One of Them
My parents told me, "Make sure you can take care of yourself," and I do.
These women need to stop lying on their backs, making babies they can’t take care of.
I’m not giving my money to support lazy women that don’t want to work.
These statements are from single mothers who were approached by The SOFEI Group to help us achieve our mission of empowering women to economic independence. The single mothers were divorced, widowed, and a sole parent with a strong support system.
What’s interesting is how proud they were to share their distinction without knowledge of our current and prospective clients. It will be impossible for women to thrive as a cohesive unit when we’re moved so swiftly to divide. Why talk about the wage gap between men and women or any other gaps that supposedly prevent women from progressing, when women allow social, political, financial, or ethnical differences create wedges? Many women who have experienced or are experiencing poverty, did not choose it! They do not enjoy relying on the government or others to feed their children or meet their basic living needs. And, it's unfortunate these women experience a different type of judgment when they need assistance to regain their momentum after a divorce, death of a spouse, spousal abandonment, decline in health, or job loss.Today's society is heading towards a downward spiral because women who carry the weight of poverty aren't participating at their best capacity. Madeleine Albright, (former United States Ambassador to the United Nations and US Secretary of State) states, "There's a special place in hell for women that don't help each other."
Women have the power to transform our society to be more inclusive and not divisive. It's a matter of choice. Which will you choose?
October 6, 2011
Can't Find a Job - Create Your Own
- Develop a winning attitude and embrace the challenge to take charge of your life.
- Define and create your dream job description without thinking about your bills or the economy. Just dream big!
- Make a two-column list and write the required skills/resources needed to fulfill this dream job on the left side and your skills on the right.
- Create an interim dream job description if you don’t have 80 percent of the required skills for your ultimate dream job.
- Create a target-list of people/businesses that can benefit from your skills.
- Identify your working/business relationship (e.g., contractor, W2 employee, consultant)
- Make a list of people currently working your dream job and define what makes you stand out from them.
- Write and send a one-page letter to business owners with your knowledge and interest, passion and skills, a value statement, and business quote from someone that has experienced your work. Also, keep a log of businesses you sent letters to.
- Send a note or post card expressing your gratitude for business owners taking time to read your letter. Do this repeatedly until you receive a response.
- Network with people that are employed and have winning attitudes.
- If you’re low on funds consider the library, churches, community colleges, or volunteerism as resources to acquire the needed skills to create the job of your dreams.